You Didn't Ask For It!

As you might have noticed here at 28ST, I'm a fan of Kris Allen. And NOT a fan of Twilight (sparkly vampires, puuuuuuuuuuuke). So I obviously was first in the internet line to buy Kris's debut album last Tuesday. I've now worn out the cassette tape, so I'm ready to run down the awesomeness of it all for your reading playsure. This is THE definitive unbiased review. Un. Biased.

Couple things to note: First, AI debut albums suck. They produce them in like 4 months while they tour. This isn't conducive to music that is good. Remember, Kelly's awesomeness began with her second album. So consider this context. Second, I'm not music-y enough to critique the album-iness of the album. I guess it doesn't really matter because iTunes has changed the artistic statements of albums anyway. So, like everyone else, I'm going to discuss it song-by-loverly-song:

STUFF EVEN NON-FANS WILL POOP IN THEIR PANTS FOR:

• Live Like We're Dying - There was a lot of hubbub over the fact that this first single is actually a cover of a song by the Script. First. Who? Right. So really who cares. And second, even if the Script never released it, almost every Idol has to sing something that was a reject of some other established star. Kelly sang Christina Aguilera. Adam sang Aerosmith, then Britney (and is now singing Pink). People, these contestants are being churned out like cookies. Let's give 'em a break and just enjoy the bouncy pop fun that is LLWD.
  
• The Truth - This ballad hurts. In a good way. I think it's one of the best blends of lyrics and melody on the whole album.
  
• Alright With Me - Think George Harrison's Got My Mind, and mix in one ridiculous falsetto note. You've got one of the happiest songs ever. And that's saying something, since songs are inanimate objects and can't have feelings.
  
• Red Guitar - Kris wrote this for Katy, so there's something very rough about it. It captures something pre-Idol about Kris, and you can sense it (deep, I KNOW). The only thing I don't like about it is that Kris sings it as if he has a speech impediment where he can't pronounce the letter "R" correctly. And you can't blame Arkansas for this one, K-Siz. But I still love you.
  
• I Need to Know - Kris has suggested that this is about a crisis of faith. Brother, tell me about it. I'm kinda flabbergasted that it's even on the album. It's like unpop. But really, really good.
  

STUFF ONLY FANS WILL PROLLY DROOL OVER:

• Before We Come Undone - Probably the most straightforward pop song of the whole album. And that's not a great thing. It's good though. I just find the resolution in the chorus totally unsurprising and unsatisfying. If I weren't a fan, I'd be sort of unswayed, but I am a fan. So woot!
  
• Is It Over - Bluesy-eyed soul at Kris's finest. But again, it sounds like a lot of other bluesy-stuff out there. I can see this being cool in concert, when Kris can play with meter a bit more. But as it is recorded, it's a touch too slow and too measured. Make is more playful.
  
• Bring It Back - Kris channels The Fray. I like it, but this is exactly the kind of song that makes me look forward to what Kris will do on album 2 with more time.
  
• Let It Rain - Cheesy lyrics aside, this is another cool ballad. But some peeps might not be able to get past the cheesy lyrics. Even if you put them aside. Which is weird, since if you put them aside, you should be able to get past them just fine. Huh.
  
• Send Me All Your Angels - Kris channels Daughtry. See BIB, supra.
  

FILLER:

• Can't Stay Away - Kris channels Maroon 5. See BIB and SMAYA, supra. Only less successfully so. Kris being swaggerific isn't all that convincing. I love him, but he's only 4 feet tall. Reminds me too much of all the Napoleon's out there trying to dunk a basketball.
  
• Written All Over My Face - There's something unsatisfying about the melody, the harmony, the way too heavy bass and rhythm, and the lyrics. It's not terrible, like Lifetime, infra, but it just feels all over the place. As if the center won't hold (even though it ultimately does).
  
• Heartless - Ok. I like this version (which critics have compared to Phil Collins's In the Air) much better than the studio version released a couple months ago. It's still not as good as the pure acoustic version Kris sang to get into the finale. Overall, it's just unnecessary (although I guess, if this was the compromise so that No Boundaries was bumped - then I wave the white flag). Especially when EVERYONE is buzzing over the Mat Kearney collab that didn't make the album.
  
• From the Ashes - Another one where I feel like the chorus was an opportunity lost for just the most ear wormy hook. It's nice, but I'm not going to remember it a couple years from now.
  

YUCK:

• Lifetime - Ugh. Don't bother. This is Kris channeling Danny Gokey. I know, RIGHT?