Memories.

Everyone keeps telling me I should change the title of my blog. People, people, that aint' happening. Mostly because I'm lazy. But also because there's no need to. I pointedly called it "____ SOMETHING" just like "twentysomething" and "thirtysomething" are non-words that people use as such. 28S was never about staying 28 forever (although, how sweet would that be), it was just a name I plucked out of thick airs and recorded on a blog that exists somewhere where I'm not. And it helpfully reminds me of how long I've been blogging on this, my public, non-controversial blog.

It's been 3 years people. 3 whole years. YIKES! That's right, I just turned... older last week. And in memoriam, can we just barf at the following?

First, I read Amelia Bedelia. None of that GooseBumps crap.

Second, remember that naked baby from the Nirvana album cover? He's all-growed up.

And third, the cast of Salute Your Shorts is also adultified.

Yuppies.

I just drove by a dude wearing Crocs on a Vespa with Trader Joe's strapped to the back. Sweet.

It's Lee.

Congrats, Lee! Yeah, I know, despite my bitching and moaning, I can't help but feel choked up watching someone's life literally change before their eyes. So what if Lee might reach Taylor Hicks levels of mediocrity? Taylor still made a shitton more money than you did last year. Who's laughing now?

I've always liked Lee. And I even noted him immediately after his audition in Chicago. Frankly, he's got the most commercial radio-voice -- moreso than Crystal. His concerts will probably suck, but that's okay because I never go to concerts anyway.

At the end of day, what really matters is that Kris Allen's haircut was ridiculously hot tonight. Ri. Di. Cu. Lous.

AI9: The Top 2... Which Means It's Almost Over!

Crystal. Kicked. Lee's. Ass.

Last year, you know, when American Idol was good, I didn't care who won. I know, right? Weird that I wasn't obsessing over Kris to win. (In retrospect, thank God he won. With the amount of support Adam's been getting as the runner-up, I can only imagine that Kris would have been but an afterthought had Adam won.) Ultimately, it came down to the fact that even if Adam wasn't my preference (heh, get it?), I still recognized that he was an amazing singer and an undeniable star.

Year before that, I was an Archie fan, and was definitely disappointed that Cookie won, but I got over it (and proceeded to buy just as many Cookie singles -- actually MORE Cookie singles than Archie singles). Because at the end of the day, Cookie was a bril arranger with a cool voice.

This year, I like Lee... as a person. He's huggable. But dude cannot sing in tune. Lee has the arc -- the more compelling growth curve and story. He also fits the non-threatening white boy mold that has been so successful the past couple years (seriously -- would Fantasia have had a chance this season?). But consarnit, Crystal deserves this. If a girl can win SYTYCD, then it can absolutely happen on Idol.

Please let Crystal win this. It would be one of the few redeeming things about this ridiculously bad season of AI.

WTF.

I hate the current Google beta.

I already have the Vampire Diaries' blessing to use Bing. Do you want me to actually prefer Bing now?

Potpourreeeeeee.

1. Yes, it is.

2. I'm necessarily biased one way or another against political parties, but I am biased against stupidity. Really Republicans? You didn't think that maybe, just maybe, this was an obtainable seat?

3. Speaking of elephants, Kris Allen's new single is The Truth. I'm surprised because I thought that Alright With Me could have been a great summer single, with The Truth being a nice fall ballad. What do I know, though? I'm a lawyer.

4. City of Gonads. It's a real thing. I'm not being obscene, either.

5. Of all the people on this list, I actually would love to see Angelina step up.

6. As much as I think a name change sucks, I have met too many people who've totally turned off to Cougar Town based on the title of the show. And I'm totally serious, after the first 2 or 3 episodes, this show found its stride and is absolutely one of the funniest shows on TV. So yeah, C-Town? Cougar-de-Sac? Dan Byrd Is The New Michael Sera? Hmm... they all still sound dirty.

7. Um, I was one of those users. (Suck it, losers! When I joined it was called thefacebook!)

AI9: The Top 3 Make Me Believe It's Almost Over.

Remember the good old days when they'd wheel out Clive Davis's desiccated body and he'd tell the pretty young things on stage to sing Whitney? I miss those days.

My favorite performance of the night was Crystal's Maybe I'm Amazed. Crystal doesn't have the most elastic voice. She's not a diva. She'll never be Kelly or Carrie. But she has the most amazing interpretive ear I'm heard on the show in quite some time, and she can translate that to her singing. It works for her. So what was great about tonight was that Ellen's song choice (yes Ellen!) got Crystal to find a middle ground that Lee's been coasting on since the beginning of the show. She let all the perfect imperfections of her limited voice come out on this huge song, and in so doing stayed true to herself and revealed a whole other side of her all at once. Amazing.

Frankly, I kinda liked Lee's Lynyrd Skynyrd song better than his Hallelujah. Here's why. Yes, I got bigger goosebumps from the latter. I recognized the song, and Lee harmonized on it something fierce. IF ONLY IT DIDN'T SEEM SO MANUFACTURED. Which is weird, right? But look. The strength of the song is the song itself. Hallelujah is a ridiculous song that makes almost anyone singing it sound good. Jason Castro legitimately sounded good on it, and Tim Urban managed to stay around a bit because of it. Of course Lee was going to sound good on it. And then he had the white light? And the back-up chorus? And the pimp spot? We get it. You want him to win, and yes, he deserves it, but no one likes having cake--no matter how good--shoved down your throats. This was an Idol Moment, sure, but a Manufactured Moment. Similar to Katherine McPhee's Over the Rainbow. Sadly, people will be talking about Lee's Hallelujah as if it were Kris's Heartless, Adam's Mad World, Carrie's Alone, Jordin's I Who Have Nothing, Fantasia's Summertime, etc.

Frankly, I don't think either Lee or Crystal had a True Moment all season.

What? There were three people who sang tonight? Oh Casey. Miserable, miserable Casey. How does it feel to be Syesha Mercado, Vonzell Solomon, and Jasmine Trias? No one cares about you at all. Not even in a "I can't Nikki McKibbin is still in this" kind of way. Go home. Vomit out that baby lamb you have stuck in your throat, defeather your hair, and cry some more tears into your pillow.