American Idol 8: The Second 12!

Here's where I posted my predictions based purely on the early rounds.

Let's start with my boy Kris. What he did right: He sang a young song that had long sustained notes to hold at the end. Kelly Clarkson once said in an interview that choosing songs with a money note like that (and hitting it) is catnip for this show. What he did wrong: He chose a fast song by a dancer. What the show did right: The judges were nice, and some of the background shots during the other songs showed Kris supporting everyone (unlike Matt G.). What the show did wrong: The footage didn't show Kris with White Chocolate, and Simon had to mention Danny again for some reason. So final verdict? It sort of depends...

Because Matt Giraud totally Anne Marie Boskovich-ed himself tonight. Talk about a fan fave who just shot himself in the foot with power ballad that dwarfed a far more intimate singer. The long notes totally gave away his awful vibrato. I'm still worried that dumb Paula's comment to judge him on earlier footage will be heeded -- and if it is, that is so f---ing unfair. Charo, I mean Paula, needs the heave-ho.

I think Jasmine also f'ed up. She has a nasal voice to begin with, and I think that showed tonight. I also think that Megan showed that her upper register notes are not very good.

So in my book, three of the favorites going in fizzled. Who benefited?

Well, Alison almost Alexis'd her way to the top, but she made a fatal AI error: SHE CHOSE A HALL OF FAME SONG. When you sing "Alone," any AI fan worth his salt recalls Carrie Underwood. Yeah, Alison was cool (and looks like Kelly Clarkson), and she sang really well, but it's not a done deal yet.

I also think that Jesse did a good job... until she started talking. Yeah, she forced Randy to put together a coherent thought in English, but man, is she abrasive and unlikeable. People who TiVo'd through the interviews to just the performances will like her... but they aren't the ones who'll be voting.

Normund is no Tatiana. But he's also no Clay. It was fun while it lasted.

And Adam did exactly what he was expected to do. And the producers did what they were expected to do by giving him the pimp-slot with the best lighting and the best camera work. And the judges did what they were expected to do by playing along. I agree with Simon: I think he's the most polarizing of the trinity, but he did enough to get his pre-AI fans to vote for him. Gah. I wanted to vomit. I wish I could undial for him.

As for the others, I couldn't tell them apart if you asked me to. Jeanine has lips. Kai looks like a constipated Sideshow Bob. Matt Breitzke was a snore (and totally lawyered by Simon). And Mishavonna apparently still thinks that leggings are cool and that songs only have one dynamic.

So again, where does that leave Kris? I wish I knew. I think that for better or for worse, Adam is in (*chunks*). I have a feeling that Alison did enough to squeeze in as the top girl. That leaves the third slot... I think that Megan might be it. But that's not a sure thing at all. If she doesn't make it, though, she can get a job as one of those wiggling hula girl toys that dance around when you press the button underneath.